Orange County

Finished dinner and lay on the couch watching "Orange County", a movie from 2002 featuring Collin Hanks. It was as nice as many others from the Home Box Office. It just crossed my mind for the situations that Shaun Brummer was going through: chasing his dream of life while everybody and everything around seemed to being turn down on him. Of course, things were not totally that bad and the happy ending was just no surprise. But sincerely, there are times that I feel the same as he did, and maybe you sometimes do so.

We always want to be independent. We try to do our best, with no or least support from anyone else. We believe that we can win what we want all by our effort and then we realize that thing seems still so far away. In the worst case, the dream we thought it would come true broke from our hands in the end. And we decide to fight with our last breath, doing e v e r y t h i n g possible trying to change things. We even start to ask for help. We may even do things that we used to consider as embarassing. It's like a fever then and we can only exhale after the last moment is over.

For many times I asked some people to stay away when they seemed to be interfering with my life. Later when I nearly exhausted and came to them for help, the first thing I receive was like, "You wanted me to stay away. So just take it yourself, it's not my business". All I did was accepting the price.

Another bitter thing is the feeling of being denied in every way I try. To me that's the most fearful thing. In fact,    life turns up and down and I know I was just at the bottom for a while, keeping moving the next top.

I know it sounds stupid but I really like it if my parents were rich enough like Shaun's to contribute to my dream school for a post-graduate course. I want to take a master degree of Urban design from a well-known education then going on becoming someone really good in the field. Well, a master degree and becoming good are not really related but they make a nice story right?

I'm on my way to a dream now. I've prepared myself for all, its coming true or slipping through at the end. Whatever happens, I won't regret cuz I worked really hard for it.. But ...sincerely, please, good luck come and smile a little smile for me!



Check IMDB for "Orange County" here
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